Throughout our lives, we often hear certain narratives about who we are and what we can or cannot achieve. These beliefs, passed down through society, culture, or even our own families, can create limitations that seem insurmountable. For a long time, I internalized many of these ideas—ideas that shaped how I saw myself and my potential. But as time went on, I realized that these beliefs were not truths—they were simply stories that could be rewritten. Here’s how some of the things I once believed have changed.
"Being a Minority, You Can’t Grow to Managerial Level"
Growing up, I was told that as a minority, there would always be a ceiling to how far I could advance, especially in leadership roles. I believed that because of my background, I would face barriers that others wouldn’t. But as I grew in my career, I realized that while challenges exist, they don’t define your path. Through hard work, networking, and continual self-improvement, I broke through that ceiling and grew into leadership roles. What I learned is that while some systems may still hold biases, your perseverance, skills, and the value you bring to the table can overcome those obstacles.
"Being Fat, You Won’t Be Able to Find a Husband"
I used to believe that appearance was everything when it came to relationships. I thought that being overweight would somehow make me unworthy of love. But over time, I discovered that relationships are built on much more than physical appearance. True connections are based on compatibility, shared values, emotional support, and mutual respect. Changing how I viewed myself—embracing self-love and confidence—shifted my perspective on relationships. I found that love isn’t about fitting a certain mold; it’s about finding someone who values you for who you are.
"If You Don’t Have a Degree, You Won’t Be Successful"
This belief used to weigh heavily on me, especially in a world where formal education is often equated with success. But through my journey, I’ve learned that while degrees can open doors, they are not the only path to success. Skills, experience, adaptability, and a growth mindset can take you just as far, if not further. Many of the most successful people I’ve met didn’t follow the traditional path of education, and they built their success through determination, self-learning, and networking. I now see success as a much broader concept—one that’s defined by resilience, creativity, and passion rather than a diploma on the wall.
"Middle Class Can’t Own a Business"
I was taught to believe that entrepreneurship was reserved for the wealthy—those who had the resources to take risks and invest in business ventures. But this belief was shattered when I began meeting and reading about individuals from middle-class backgrounds who started successful businesses from the ground up. The idea that you need to be born into wealth to own a business is simply not true. I’ve learned that with the right strategy, dedication, and willingness to take calculated risks, anyone can become a business owner, regardless of their socioeconomic background.
"If You Are Not an Extrovert, You Can’t Do Networking"
Networking used to seem like an extrovert’s game—a place where only the most outgoing and charismatic people could succeed. As someone who isn’t naturally extroverted, I used to feel like I was at a disadvantage. But as I gained more experience, I realized that networking isn’t about being the loudest person in the room; it’s about building genuine relationships. By focusing on listening, asking thoughtful questions, and connecting with people on a deeper level, I’ve been able to build a strong network—proving that introverts can be just as effective at networking as extroverts.
"If You Don’t Wear Makeup, You Won’t Look Presentable"
The pressure to conform to beauty standards was something I once believed deeply. I thought that to be seen as professional or attractive, I had to wear makeup and present myself in a certain way. But over time, I learned that looking presentable isn’t about adhering to someone else’s standards; it’s about feeling comfortable and confident in your own skin. Whether I wear makeup or not doesn’t define my professionalism, competence, or worth. I now embrace a more authentic version of myself, where I prioritize my comfort and sense of self over external expectations.
"If You Are Not Fair, People Won’t Like You"
Colorism is an unfortunate reality in many cultures, and for a long time, I believed that being fair-skinned was tied to being liked, accepted, or admired. But I’ve since come to realize that real beauty and likability come from within—your personality, kindness, intelligence, and the way you treat others matter far more than skin tone. I’ve learned to love and accept my complexion as part of who I am, rather than seeing it as a limitation.
Changing the Narrative
These beliefs may have once held me back, but I’ve learned that they don’t define my potential or my future. Over time, I’ve actively challenged these narratives and rewritten them with new, empowering beliefs. It hasn’t always been easy, but it’s been deeply rewarding. Today, I believe that we all have the power to grow, succeed, and live authentically—no matter where we come from or what society tries to tell us.
The truth is, the stories we’ve been told can change. It starts with questioning them, then reframing them in a way that serves us. And when we do, we unlock new possibilities for ourselves and others.
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