Saturday, 3 November 2018

Ditched by friends after marriage : can you relate?


     When you got married your focus changes.It is no longer about only you.It is about partner,kids and family,in laws and responsibilities. If you are single,very common statement you will hear is, "you don’t understand,marriage life is not that easy". All of us have 24 hours a day,you have to make choices and keep making it all 1,440 minutes of every 24 hours a day. It is all about priorities,yes true indeed!

I feel blessed having friends who always there for me, knows my moods and my everyday life, more than 10 years and nothing has changed over the years. I also have friends who rarely meet but constantly text me to check on me atleast once a week. and many more sincere friends. No matter what our status,lifestyle or responsibilities we still keep each other in priority list.Why?
   
     These people has same 24 hours a day and much more busy life but they know value of friendship. We are friends who turned to family now.Thats what i call true friendship. I have been there for them so they know they will be there for me.So if you happen to get ditched totally after your friend married it does not means you don’t deserve such meaningful friendship. It is totally because your friend needs more than 24 hours to include you in life after married. Most important things,priorities !!!!

    I totally disagree with the statement that friendships fades after marriage,true friends will stick together through thick and thin. I am proud to say i have such amazing friends.That being said,being married doesn’t mean you should neglect your friends totally. If you ever did that due to any reasons such as focus changes,lack of time or priorities changed.My only advice is don’t come back one day and expect to be treated as same way. Because life doesn’t have pause or rewind button.

     Trust me if you choose to be so busy with own life for so long and come back to renew  friendship,many things might changed.Even your bodies and minds changes every 7 year,every cell in your body replaced by new cells. The only thing that does not change in this world is the word itself : change. So if  you don’t make effort,people eventually will leave you or maybe forget you. Making effort is not about picking up phone once in blue moon and asking for meet up or  planning reunions once a year.

    My 2 cents advice is stay connected.When I say stay connected i mean connected for real. No matter how advanced we are,human touch is something that everyone deserve. A true friend does not only has to know updates about you from social media. I will kill my best friend if she updates something very important in social media before she tells me.Come one i have been with you before we had Nokia3310 !! But I am blessed I get what I give in my life. People love me more than i love them.

   My all time favourite quote by Will Smith, If you’re absent during my struggle don’t expect  to be present during my success. There is group of people will remember you only when they need help or when they lonely. While some only remains as memories in photo albums. Ask yourself where you stand in your friends life ?

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